These are ways I have found that help me speak more kindly to myself. Perhaps they will help you as well!
- Once you realize you are doing it start paying attention to it and write down the events leading up to it, and how you felt. Through journaling, you'll begin seeing what causes it.
- When you are able to pinpoint the causes, it will be easier to “catch” when you call yourself names in the present moment. You will be practicing mindfulness!
- Have you heard of mirror talk? It may sound strange, but it's one of my go-tos when I'm being hard on myself. Stand in front of a mirror and talk to yourself, using positive affirmations.
- Write down all of your best qualities. If you're having difficulty starting, ask your closest family and friends for their input. Read the list out loud to yourself as often as you wish.
- Practice, practice, practice! It takes time to teach yourself anything that's new, so be patient with yourself, and celebrate your progress.
Sometimes learning new ways of behaving can be challenging, even if it's positive changes. If you are struggling, help is readily available. Reach out to your parents, a mentor, your school counselor, and/or family doctor. They can assist by referring resources, such as therapists, programs, and support groups.
Words are powerful, so when talking to yourself and to others, choose them wisely!
1 Gordon, Sherri (2022, July 22). 9 Consequences of Name-Calling. verywell family. https://www.verywellfamily.com/consequences-of-name-calling-460613#:~:text=Harms%20Mental %20Health,helpless%2C%20and%20out%20of%20control
2 BlkSpace Therapy (2021, January 22). 5 Ways Name Calling Effects Mental Health. BlkSpace. https://www.blkspacetherapy.com/post/5-ways-name-calling-effects-mental-health